The Importance of Oral Hygiene and other "Mother of the Year" stories

I have a confession to make.  Nolan had not visited a dentist until last week.  Part of this was the "I'm too busy" epidemic, some of it was "I didn't see a dentist when I was a kid" (I think most of us know how that turned out) and some of it was old-fashioned denial.  Then a few weeks ago I noticed a dark spot on one of his teeth. Then, seriously, within a week that brown spot went from small to large. 
Our first visit to (what might be the BEST child dentist in the country) the dentist went really well. 

Until I heard this:  "Nolan needs a crown"

Oh my gosh.  The bottom of my stomach fell out.  I felt a deep sense of guilt.  The type of guilt that forces you to tell strangers on the street and wake up in the middle of the night in a sweat (both happened to me). 

Today Karl took Nolan in to the dentist for the crowning.  He was a trooper (as always) and although he wasn't thrilled about being at school he told all of his friends that he had a new "silver tooth". 

I know there are bigger issues that kids have to deal with as a result of poor parenting.  Like my deeply embedded distain for anything resembling Christmas.  Or my bad sleeping habits and stress management skills that have rubbed off on him.  But, there's something more concerning to me than the oral hygiene issue. It's the idea that I could use my 'busy-ness' to rationalize not being proactive with my child's care.  Perhaps that sounds like I am being too hard on myself, and for just a big cavity, perhaps I am.  But, I know first hand, too close, that you should never take your child's (or your own) health for granted. 

There is an important lesson in here for me, and Nolan.  For me: I have to get my schedule under control.  For Nolan: he has to "floss his face off"  (quoting the oral hygienist). 
 

First Day of School

This might be the biggest milestone we have experienced as a family.  On Tuesday, Nolan joined the ranks as a student.  He goes to full-day Kindergarten (8:15-3:00) and seems to be really enjoying himself.  As I compared stories with other parents of Kindergartners I learned that it is very common for them to demonstrate unusual bravery in the face of a new challenge, and Nolan was no exception.  He woke up on time, ate breakfast and got dressed like a trooper.  Both Karl and I dropped him off, and he walked right in, sat right down and waved goodbye.  Just like that.  I made it to the car, and then I sobbed.  I was so proud.  I was so sad. 

He has not complained a bit about school, having to get up early, any of it.  The first few days I asked him what he learned and his response was "I learned how to drive a monster truck and a motorcycle".  I was starting to wonder what school we sent him to when I got the 'Friday folder', a detailed itinerary of all the things that he learned that week.  Apparently, he learned about math, science, english, and history (about India no less).  No word on monster trucks or motorcycles. 

In a flash

Summer is almost over, I just don't know where the time went.  I promised updates and we haven't even done that. 

Door County was a lovely time.  One week of vacation and three weeks of wishing we were on vacation.  Nolan loves it there, but by the end of it he was very excited to be home to see his friends and be back with Dad. 

I can't believe all this stuff fits in our cars!

He loves the jelly beans at Wilson's!

Look familiar?  We had dinner at Landmark.  The place looks the same.

The next event was Nolan's Birthday.  His actual birthday was on Wednesday. 

Kooky faces for breakfast, and a regular day otherwise.

 The bouncy house mid blow-up.  It tooks the guys about 5 minutes to drop the thing off.

The cake was a big hit, you can't tell by this pic, but the Hulk's hands are on the left, Thor's hammer is in the middle and Iron Man's mask is on the right.  Capt America's shield is on top.  Check out this:

www.jessicascakes.com

Here's the bouncy house all blown up.  It was also a big hit.  Hours of bouncing fun. 

Now the next big event for us is Nolan's first day of school.  We have recently had a change of heart regarding public school.  He will attend school in the fall, but we are considering other options.

On another note, Karl likes his new job.  It's taken some adjusting but he's settled in.  We have enjoyed having more time together as his commute is much shorter.  My book comes out in a couple of weeks.  It's available for eReaders (Kindle & iPad) at Amazon and iTunes. Surreal feeling.   

Summer's Here

So many updates so little time!  The weather has been lovely here in Minnesota, for the most part.  We've had a lot of rain which makes up for the complete lack of snow this winter.  That has spelled plenty of grass mowing and weed pulling in our new yard. 
We bought Nolan a little playset for the backyard a few weeks ago.  I believed it has sealed our reputation of being the house to play at (a goal we had, but in hindsight I am not sure what we were thinking). 
We have a countdown on Nolan's calendar for our Door County trip.  We are all looking very forward to it, I can't believe we only have two weekends before we are on our way.  Karl started his new job a few weeks ago.  It was a big adjustment to go from an office to a cube but the work sounds interesting and he's got plenty to offer them. 
The book is done and in final stages of production.  I think overall it's a good product, but I still and will probably always see the weak points.  It reminds me of the saying that's written on the whiteboard at work:  "Good is the enemy of excellence;  excellence is the enemy of free time"

We will do our best to keep you up-to-speed over our Door County adventures.  Big summer, and bigger fall, Nolan turns 5, starts Kindergarten and goes to Disney!

Desert Nights

Karl and I just got back from a long weekend in Phoenix.  If you ever need a get-away in the spring look no further than Phoenix.  It's warm there, but its the 'dry' heat, so 90-degrees feels positively therapeutic.  We stayted at Tapatio Cliffs http://www.tapatiocliffshilton.com/ an incredible all-suites Hilton resort.  We highly recommend it.  After hours pool-side, and just some old-fashioned R & R we are back and better than ever.  Here's some pictures:

In other news:
The duck abandoned her nest, and the one egg, for (what we hope to be) better surroundings.  We still have frequent visits from Ma and Pa Mallard, so they're around. 
Please mark your calendar for an open house, yes we are finally going to have people over!  We'll be super-efficient and celebrate Karl's birthday and have an open house on Saturday, June 2nd.  Watch for an evite!

It is official

Well, just to be sure, Nolan and I took a look this morning and we were surprised to see Ma Mallard working on her clutch.

I guess that makes it official, we might have to set up warnings to keep people away from our front door for the next 5-7 weeks.  Good thing we don't use our front door ourselves!  Nolan is excited to watch what happens.  

An Easter surprise - for all of us

Well, it was just Nolan that was surprised this Easter.  Yesterday, or the day before, we noticed a depression in some of the mulch by our house, just off our front porch.  Some type of creature was digging around, and we assumed it was looking for something to eat.

Today, there is an egg in the depresssion - and NOT the colored variety.

Our front porch.

The "depression" - can be barely seen in the second opening from the left post.

The "surprise" ... we will see if more arrive.  

It could make for an interesting couple of months, whether or not Ma Mallard decides to come back.  I've been doing some research to see if this is normal, or if we are in trouble, and found a like to a site.

http://www.npwrc.usgs.gov/about/faqs/birds/nestpot/nest.htm

There is a part of me that hopes this works, as it will be great watching for Nolan.  But it could also be complicated, as people won't be able to use our front door if Ma Mallard becomes very protective!  So, if you stop by the house and see protective fencing keeping you from the front door -  you've been warned.

Easter - 2012

Happy Easter everyone!  


Nolan was very excited about the Easter Bunny coming this morning - and woke up extra early just because.  We had a so-so attempt at dying eggs.  Quite a few cracked during the boiling phase.  Now that we have a house, hopefully I'll be able to find a place to have a "hobby space" so that I can start working on Pysanky again - Ukrainian Easter Eggs.  


Nolan was very surprised, as the Easter Bunny left a pretty big present.  

The "jelly bean" trail left by the Easter Bunny.

What is this?

Did you find your "basket"?

That Easter Bunny had a hard time getting this all together! 

(please excuse the laundry)

Hard to believe he has grown out of his first bike already, and is now into the 16-inch size.  We are still working on training wheels, but it will probably end this summer.  

Long Overdue Updates

I have been thinking about posting this update for well over a month but I have just never gotten to it.  Sorry for those of you that wait patiently wondering what in the world we have been up to.  Well, we've been busy.

In January we took a trip to the Netherlands.  It was my (Laura) first trip outside of the US.  It was quite an experience, I'm glad that we chose the Netherlands for our first trip because most people spoke English and there was good public transportation.  We didn't really care for Amsterdam, but we enjoyed Groningen very much.  Here's a few pictures from our trip (we also got a book of pictures created from Shutterfly, for when people visit!)

We have been enjoying the unseasonably warm spring.  I was surprised to learn that while I was in Louisiana it was warmer in Minnesota (in March!).  Work has been very busy for both of us, and as Karl mentioned in the last post, I submitted my manuscript, on-time, not bad for a rooky.  There have been a number of edits since February and the book is now in production.  It's also available for pre-order on Amazon.  It has been a nerve-wracking and exhausting effort, but it feels very good to have it accomplished.

A Major Milestone

This is Karl...  Yes, Laura has been doing most of the writing lately, but in this case, I just had to get this message out to all of you that follow this blog.  

Yesterday marked a very major milestone for Laura.  As many of you might know, Laura is in the process of writing a book on Healthcare Business Intelligence - which is what she does for a living.  Don't ask me to explain it all now...  ;)

February 6, 2012 marked the date when all materials needed to be turned into the publisher.  Laura has submitted all the materials, and now begins phase two of this amazing journey.  That's right, the majority of all the writing has finished.  I am incredibly proud that she has reached this point, and she has pushed herself along this whole time.  She has been able to fit in book writing among the following: her regular work duties (which are many), keeping up with the house, moving to a new house, an international trip (post and pictures to come), and just being a mom. 

We look forward to the next milestone, knowing that this one was the most challenging. 
Congratulations Laura!!!

Carpe Diem!

I am going to start this post in a question and answer format.  These are the questions that people have been asking me the most recently.

"How was your Christmas"
Christmas was very nice.  We celebrated with the Fletcher side in a lovely rented lake home in Cambridge.  Sarah is nine-months pregnant (picture below) and we didn't want her to travel too far away from her home.  We rented the house for her wedding so we knew it would suit our needs.  Other than some uncomfortable beds it was a really nice way to spend time together.  The Madsen's celebrated on Christmas Day at Mardelle and Eric's house.  Of course Nolan got a haul (good thing we have a bigger house).  So many legos so little time, oddly enough many of those were for Karl :)  We are on to you mister!

"What's wrong with your neck?"
Well, over the holidays I started to develop some pain in my right shoulder.  I have an on-going issue with my neck from a car accident 20-years ago, so it's not unusual for me to have pain, tingling and stiffness off and on.  This, however, went from "geez, that's sore" to "Holy F&%! that hurts like a son-of-a B&$*#@" in short order.  Turns out I herniated my C5, that burning sensation (really felt like someone poured gasoline and lit me on fire, but I digress) all down my right side last about 10 days.  I spent much of it on the couch with my laptop, the remotes and eventually the right medication.  We are on the mend now. 

"How's the book coming?"
Funny you should ask...I have one chapter left to write.  That's really amazing if I do say so myself!  The work is far from over, but I am reaching the end of the 'tyranny of the blank page' stage so that's a really good feeling.  I still don't have an official publication date but I expect that soon. 

As for other news...and pictures...
I am trying to be better about living each day fully, so my new year's resolution was to Sieze the day!  (hence the blogpost title).  My goal is that each day I do something that adds joy, laughter or fun.  So far my success rate is about 50/50.  We aren't talking big things here, anything small that makes me laugh or smile and stop in that moment.  That's the goal.

One carpe diem moment came on Saturday when Nolan and I were playing on the floor.  We were pushing a car back and forth and I pushed it towards him a bit hard and it hit him in the private parts.  He yelled "Oh, my nuts!"  Oh, lord.  I fell over laughing.  That was the funniest thing I had heard in a long time.  When I asked him where he heard that (it isn't something that is generally said around here) he said "the big boys at school say it", ahhh, that makes sense.
Here's another one:

I love this mug, and I am a big fan of Wonder Woman (goes back to the actual show, like the 1970's version).

Here are some more fun pics:

Baby Clara soon to make an appearance!

Pretty much sums it up :)

And a couple of fun videos:

Nolan on Chocolate

Slippery Driveway

Photos

Just a picture post today. 

I got new headshots.  This is the one that will go in the book.

Nolan's new favorite camera pose

We have a cardinal!

Thank you Captain Obvious

Writing a book is really hard work.  I knew it was going to be 'hard', because most things worth doing are.  But, seriously, I had no idea.  I sometimes feel like I am just wringing my brain out, I have this visual on the worst days of a spongebob-esque brain being twisted tight until it becomes flacid and useless.  I have asked advice from my friends that have written books and their best advice has been 'buckle down', 'create a routine', or 'just write and go back to edit later'.  I so far, have not followed their advice.  Yes, I have buckled down.  This week will represent the halfway mark for content submission and for the most part I have met all of my deadlines.  But, what I have found is the harder I try the less I am able to produce voluminous works.  I am chugging along, but there is now a pool at work on the date that I will lose my marbles. 

My other consternation is the criticism.  At some point a few weeks ago I had the shocking realization that people may actually read this book.  Gulp.  A little known tidbit about me, I suck at criticism.  I rock at constructive criticism because I am always seeking to improve.  But when it comes in the form of snarky comments made by those that would rather bitch than do anything valuable to contribute, well, that just pisses me off.  A couple of weeks ago I did a webinar for TDWI.  One anonymous attendee felt the need to tweet that it was the worst webinar he had ever attended, yet he attended the whole thing.  That's the same as someone eating all their food at a restaurant and then complaining that it was awful.

So, if you can tell, I have reached full panic/freak-out mode.  I have a favor to ask of you throngs of readers, be gentle on me the next few months.  In all candor, it's going to be a tough row to hoe for the next two months.  Work is very busy and to add fuel to a raging fire, it is now officially Christmastime, my absolute least favorite time of the year (yes, I am a grinch, move on, I have :).  Not only will I need all the support you can give, but so will Karl and Nolan as we push on through crunch time. 
Thank you, and good night

The Shape of Me

This year at Thanksgiving we were given as assignment to discuss our grandparents.  Specifically, what they meant to us.  I really only knew one of my grandparents, my paternal grandmother.  My mother's parents died before I was born and my paternal grandfather was 80 when I was born.  He lived until he was 96, but there were only shadows of the man I got to know through stories. 

My grandmother was an amazing woman.  She went back to Columbia to get her masters degree in her 50's.  She raised three children as a virtual single mother when that was unheard of.  She was steadfast in her commitment to education and her church.  She told me that a lady should never leave the house without lipstick (I violate that rule almost every day).   Education and independence were so important to her, and I believe that I made her proud. 

People shape you-- your grandparents, parents, siblings, friends, children, etc.  Sometimes you forget how much, and it's nice sometimes to stop and think about it, and be thankful for the shape of me. 

A sincere thank you!

We have been in the new house for just over a week. Well, let me clarify, Nolan & Karl have been in the house--I have been on the road.  But, it's still really cool to know that a lovely new home is waiting for me on the other end.

We have a lot of people to thank for this.  First, all the movers, who took time out of their Saturday to help us.  In no particular order:  Dad, Lois, Mardelle, Martha, Andy, Sarah, Rocky (and Joey in spirit!), Sarah, David and David, Michael, John, Carl George, Neil, Jeff, Randy & Emily.  My apologies if I failed to mention you.  There were so many wonderful people that brought vehicles, trailers and just dug in.  The move took about 4 hours, incredible!

To our Realtor, Mike Esterley (Edina Realty).  Karl met Mike at an open house earlier in the summer.  We met with Mike to get a feel for his approach.  Although I doubt Mike would admit it, I think he was skeptical at first.  We were planning on renting and getting a new mortgage and in this market, it's not an easy under-taking.  Mike was nothing short of stellar.  He really went above and beyond.  His energy and single-minded focus on getting us a house that fit us was impressive.

Last, but so not least, Sari Lederman (AdvisorNet Mortgage).  I met Sari back in 2001 when I was single and I was hoping for a more grounded life (or at least one that didn't involve moving every year).  She counseled me (for years). She was patient, thorough and not once led me astray (as evidenced by our current position).  

Good people got us where we are at, in some cases literally.  Thank you all!

Working

I'll admit, my work is a little odd.  I have been here for nearly 3 years and I still have a hard time getting used to the ebb and flow of the business.  Some days I could spend all day writing, others I am up to my eyeballs in work.  I'm getting better at going with the flow.

Two incredible professional things have happened to me this year.  First, I have been asked to give a keynote speech on the future of Healthcare BI in Groningen, Netherlands in January.  If you're interested you can look it up here www.allaboutdata.umcg.nl
Of course the second is my book, which still feels rather amorphous to me.  I write a lot as part of my job, but those are 2-4 page articles, this is a book with over 250 pages!  So this week I sat down and started pulling everything together that I already had.  I got this...my first draft

I still have a long way to go, but there were more pages here than I thought.  It feels a little bit more real now that this pile of papers are collated under chapters.

Progress?

Like most things in life, progress is relative.  We have spent the last two weekends packing.  Each week we are able to pack up more stuff.  Thankfully this weekend was a long one, but we also had the complication of having the house look decent for a rental showing on Tuesday.  Somehow we managed to pull off both.  The townhouse shined like a new penny.  I should have taken pictures since she doesn't dress up that much anymore :).  We are having a garage sale this weekend (9/10), and yes I am a glutton.  I have no idea what I was thinking other than my blind ambition to de-clutter and purge.

I did the math (that should surprise no one) and I have to write about 1 1/3 pages each work day between now and February to meet the deadline.  The first day after that I wrote over 4 pages, then haven't done any  :(  I have done some editing work, word choice, tone, etc. but no addition of actual content.  Believe it or not, Don Draper from Mad Men said it best "Think about it deeply. Then forget it."  It seems as if most of my writing happens after this exact process.

A picture for your enjoyment:

Big News

By now many of you know our big news, but for those of you that haven't heard:
We bought a house!
If you have been following the blog long you know that this is something we have been wanting to do for about three years.  It took us quite a while to decide what to do, and in the end we decided to rent out the town-home.  Not an easy decision, but one that has allowed us to buy a nice 2,000 sq. ft. house on a quiet cul-de-sac.  The most important feature?  The lot, about .35 acres.  Not exactly hobby farm size, but it's a nice lot for the city.


Also, I got a book deal!
It's a work book, about Healthcare Business Intelligence.  I am very excited, as this was one of the goals I wrote down for my New Year's Resolutions.  It's being published by Wiley and should be out next summer.  I will post more updates about the process as I make progress.  


Finally, please send your prayers and thoughts to my dear friend over at "Better late than never" (favorites blogs listed here on the right).  Her husband was in a motorcycle accident last weekend, he's making good progress, and thankfully was wearing his helmet, but he broke his neck at C4. They have a long road ahead of them.

It's time to go

Believe it or not, it's been 5-weeks since we started our Door County adventure.  The mini-remodel on the house is complete and Nolan is tan and probably forever a Door County fanatic.  He confirmed that yesterday when he announced his plan to work at Leroy's coffee shop when he grows up (oh, I could only wish).  Nolan is a regular at the coffee shop here and he hangs out just like the locals (or so I am told). 


The beach has been a regular visit for us, the one in Ephraim is big and shallow so it's perfect for the smaller kids.  I had forgotten how much sand you can bring home after a few hours at the beach.  I could probably make my own sandy beach with the sand I have in my car. 


Not sure what I will miss most, but I am ready to go home.  The next couple weeks could bring lots of changes for the Madsen clan.  I will post updates to that cryptic reference when I know more (and no, that doesn't involve a little brother or sister for Nolan).


Pictures:

He calls them 'sparkles'

A castle with a moat!

Argh, I am a pirate, matey!  Also a mini golf prodigy, two holes-in-one this summer!

Ice Cream, you Scream, we all scream for Door County Ice Cream Factory

A Peek Inside my Twisted Mind

I continue to work from this beautiful place. There is something here that defies explanation; a spiritual calmness that settles even the most shaken of souls. At least that’s what I felt as I was driving through town looking at the stunning watery landscape. Then, as if a sudden and unwanted stranger woke me from my sleep I looked up to see an ambulance barreling full lights and sirens down a tourist-laden two-lane road. Instantly, my heart-rate went up, I bit my bottom lip and my eyes started to water. Why, you ask? Do I have some psychic power that I am now just admitting to? No psychic power, just a tenuous grip. For me, when I see or hear of anything bad, a flood of anxiety washes over me. I struggle frequently to keep my head above the onslaught of the obsession. It could easily overwhelm me, and in my darker days, it has.


See, bad things happen all the time, to really good people. And in some twisted version of my world, I feel that my happiness makes me more vulnerable to the bad stuff. I constantly feel like I am walking a tight-rope with no net, just waiting for a strong wind of misfortune or bad timing to come along and tumble me and everything I have to oblivion. Right about now you are probably thinking to yourself, “Laura, if you really feel this way you should see someone. It ain’t healthy.” (Quote from my favorite movie of all time, extra points if you guess it). True, but I am hoping that the recording of this, here in this blog and for posterity, will help me. The first step in any 12-step program is admitting you have a problem. Admission, check.